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Darkness. Beeps. WTF? And Supa Gay Sunday! - Nick's Valve [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Nick Verne

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Darkness. Beeps. WTF? And Supa Gay Sunday! [Jun. 20th, 2010|06:11 pm]
Nick Verne
Yesterday evening we were enacting Domestic Bliss Act III Scene ii in which cats are catting, wine has been poured, internet browsing is happening, dishwasher is washing, heater is warming, dinner is thought about. Then click! We plunge into darkness. Various smoke alarms beep their "where's the power at?" beeps. Great, we think. Another random power outage lasting a few seconds/minutes that seems to happen about every three months here in our neighbourhood.

Except our neighbours across the street haven't lost their power. Nor has next door. Hmm, suspicious. I venture out in my domestic bliss socks to the power board to see which switch has tripped. They're all lined up neatly in the on position on the left side. It's the main one for the house. Bummer. So I switch it back. It flips back imperceptibly fast into the "off" position.

Now my experience comes in. I've been in this situation before. This tells me there's a short circuit somewhere in the house. Some electrical thing has no fuse to blow, otherwise the machine would merely stop and not take down the main power. I'm immediately sniffing around the dishwasher. It's an old clunker from the 1989 renovation of our Balmain Domestic Bliss Dacha. It is a Chef brand, and Australian made (or at least with a label slapped on in Australia) piece of cheapness. Think Kenmore from Sears if you're American. Except lower quality. (Hangs head - I know I'm supposed to be loyal to the Aussie product). It has a water heating element inside. I have a hunch that it has melted down.

Anyway, I test my hunch with Yuri and Firbank looking on. I find the dishwasher power plug in the cupboard next to the machine and unplug it. Out I go again and flip the mains switch. Back to life we are. Power on, lights, camera, DSL modem, action. Just to be sure I (somewhat recklessly) plug the dishwasher back in. Plpf. Lights out, beeps from scared smoke alarms, Dax meows at me to quit it. I don't mention to yuriverse that I just risked my life on the main circuit breaker not being faulty. It worked once, but who knows if it got damaged? (OK, I exaggerate. There was no risk. The breaker worked. It worked right under my finger outside. It didn't smell. It wasn't warm. You can trust it.)

That was enough of my proving the dishwasher to be the culprit. It was clearly dead. It could be repaired (maybe). It didn't smell burny or anything like that. But it was a noisy old clunker and far too unfashionable for today's domestic kitchen.

Today Yuri and I went dishwasher shopping. Moore Park Home Makers' Supa Center. Jam packed with homos. It's far gayer than any bar on Oxford St. Anyway, we did Bing Lee first. Medium Pressure Sales Guy gave us a rapid fire rundown on the merits of the various models. Bosch looked nice - they had one that has the silverware on a flat tray the the top of the machine. OK, so we're now no longer looking at <$1K.

Being an old hand at the "whitegoods" shopping, I did what any well bred homosexual would do, and went immediately to the competition at Harvey Norman. "Bing Lee offered that one for $100 less and free delivery and installation". (OK, I made that last part up, but nobody's children will go hungry over this). So now Medium-High Pressure Sales Girl starts rabbiting on about how the Miele model is $200 off today, has the same features plus more steel and less plastic and anyway the external finish is better quality and easier to keep clean and look at the great user-maintainable drain thingy so you don't need to get serviced and it's Miele for Snob's Sake.

So Miele beat out Bosch. It arrives Tuesday and hopefully Cameron the installer will be hot.

Do Sundays get any gayer without a visit to Ken's?

[User Picture]From: animator
2010-06-20 09:21 am (UTC)
Do Sundays get any gayer without a visit to Ken's?

Depends if you're the minister representing the centre of the universe?
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